heartbreak

today our hearts were broken. by a thirteen year old boy named Jonas (pronounced YO-nas).  Jonas wasn't here on our last trip, but this boy came around today and Jeff and I were left deeply moved after meeting him.  this boy immediately presents as one with significant medical issues.  i may be rusty with my nursing skills, but anyone could see the signs of something systemically wrong in his body.  his eyes are jaundiced.  he has fine bumps on his face~ indicating some sort of rash or virus, as well as extremely dry lips.  his neck is covered with a large scar that appears to be burn related.  his eyes look weary and somewhat forlorn.  i said to Jeff, it's as though his spirit has come to accept the fact that life will include pain and sorrow, and not to ever expect more from it.  the other children pointed to their own soccer shirts and then to Jonas, indicating that he hadn't received one.  i went to my stash in the room and found one that would fit, with shorts that looked about his size.  he smiled wide, nodded and in perfect English whispered "thank-you".  when he noticed the children writing letters to Joelle (aka Joawhh)and Hannah, he wanted to join in, even though he'd never met the girls.  i watched him closely as he wrote the most beautiful letter, in English even. he shared in the letter that he had no parents, and that he'd never had any chance to play sports or have a sports shirt, so this was something he was so happy about.  he closed by saying "i cannot express my happiness"...i asked him about his parents. he said "they both died".  i wrapped my arms around him and said how sorry i was to hear this.  i think i figured out that he lives with his uncle now.  i don't know if there is a mother figure in his life.  i also find myself wondering if he has AIDS, and if his parents had the same before they eventually lost their fight.  anyway, his little spirit was so gentle and calm with the other children.  when jeff and i returned to our room later we both wrestled hard with the reality that Jonas is simply one child, on one street, representing thousands more just like him....the tears are here again.  it is not fair.  my dear 13 year old has never known such pain and heartache, thankfully. i wish for Jonas warmth tonight.  for security and peace and healing.  i long to see him receive the critical medical care that he deserves.  i wish for him to feel the loving arms of parents tucking him in at night.  to see him soak his dirt-covered feet in a warm soapy tub. to play and be free to explore his God-given potential.  to become the boy and man that he is meant to be.  i don't even know if Jonas will survive here very long.  it's hard to say. jeff would like me to ask him some questions, to try to understand if anything medically is being done for him.  i'm not sure i can handle the answers.  we both feel so helpless.  please pray for Jonas tonight.  i will post a picture of him when we get home.  but his face is just an image of Ethiopia that will forever be etched in our minds.

on to a happier note...another beautiful day with Alemayehu.  we woke him this morning at 9:00 am (yes we did!!).  apparently the injera and goat's meat from the previous evening sat well in his tummy and he slept content and peacefully. we are relishing in the moments we've been given to get to know one another.  honestly, it is like AJ just can't seem to soak in enough of our affection.  he randomly reaches out and kisses our cheeks.  he makes lots of eye contact and is becoming more vocal and silly.  we saw a little bit of attitude at lunch~ not much, but a little.  it was actually a good sign, because we see how his comfort level is increasing.  he is testing boundaries a bit, yet responding well when directed.  tonight we bathed him again and wrapped him in a towel.  he rocked on my lap, not moving a bit.
then i laid him down on the bed and massaged the lotion onto his skin~ rubbing his arms and legs and face and tummy.  i see the many scars on his body and i wonder what he experienced during his first few years of life.  his belly is bloated.  his feet are peeling.  i was singing to him and he just stared (might have been my vocals, not sure) being super still.  his eyes were heavy and he looked like he was thinking life was pretty good...well, we agree.  life is good and we're so blessed to be here living this dream.  well, once again, dad and AJ are asleep.  i will wrap this up, realizing i'm rambling some tonight....tomorrow is another day, and hopefully i'll update again soon.